So Cat came out wearing some backless monstrosity with a black muff eating her head and I thought, “Bad night at the office ahead.” But no, kittens. I was sorely mistaken. Our intrepid top 10 turned it out, darlings. I think that may have been one of the best top 10 nights ever. And chock full of dance! Oh, my stars and garters. Two dances plus solos for all? Oh, Nigel. You really want to break these kids down. Let’s hop to it because results night will be upon us before we know it. We’ll go in order because there’s so much and I just can’t, noodles. Everyone into the pool.
Clip Free Zone
No rehearsal clips. I think I just died and went to SYTYCD heaven. And cute parents by the barrel full. Even FPs mom and her truly tragique hair gave us something to love. And I’m not talking about the Bumpit she was sporting. So much love for the parents. Especially Jakob’s poor, confused, sports obsessed dad. Look at him now, y’all. He loves his live, gay son! Russell’s dad, Ellenore’s mom (moved to NYC, what?), Legacy’s dad groovin’ in the audience and embarrassing him all to hell. Parents are love, family. Go call yours. Well, finish reading this first and then go call yours.
And Now, We Dance
Noelle/Ryan/Hip Hop/NappyTab (Give It To Me Right/Melanie Fiona) – Well, it wasn’t hip hop, but we knew that, right? NappyTab tried to get all Mandy Table Dance on us with the business at the desk, but then it all devolved into some left over No Air/Bleeding Love nonsense. They are still trying to re-capture that lightning in a bottle, but all of their tricks are so tired. Noelle was good here, better than Ryan. But Ryan was yards better in this hip hop than he had been during his first attempt. The white clad, skiing thieves fiasco. Ptui. Let us never speak of it again. But this? Well, it was OK. The whole dance was kind of content free. And these two weren’t terrible. They weren’t terrific, either. That will be a theme with them. Take note. Hip hop on SYTYCD continues to be the big loser. I’ve never missed Shane more.
Ashleigh/Legacy/Contemporary/Gary Stewart (Missed the song name/Prodigy) – Kiddies, I confess. I did not get it. At all. I’m normally down to go wherever the choreographers want to take me, especially if they push a challenge on the audience and force them to wake up from their competition coma, but this piece just did nothing for me. I think it was technically demanding. It was aggressive and aerobic. It required a lot of attack from the dancers and there were some challenging technical pieces. A couple of nice turn sequences from them both. Lots of lifts and throws. And can we deal with the fact that Fug Princess was serving tonight? Noodles, she destroyed this piece. Aggressive and strong with a display of some surprisingly solid technique. Legacy held his own and got the best move of the dance with the ending headstand. And yet, I didn’t like it. It just kind of unfolded without grabbing me in any way. Eh. I’d still like to see more from this Gary Stewart. He’s definitely a new POV on the show. I’m just not sure I got it. Nix that, noodles. I’m quite sure I didn’t get it. I’m intrigued, though.
Mollee Solo (Rock the Beat/LMFAO) – I hate the Tween Terror and her flipping, flopping, competition dancer ass. That’s all.
Russell Solo (Black Milk/Outkast) – Amazing. There are no words. As much as I hate Mollee, that’s how much I love Russell. Kid is a star.
Kathryn/Nathan/Broadway/Spencer Liff (Choreography/Danny Kaye) – Spencer Liff is my Broadway god. Kittens, how can they ever, ever let Tasty do broadway again on this show now that we’ve seen what it can and should look like? That, darlings, was marvelous work by both choreographer and dancers. Kathryn is a wonder. Her legs and feet. She really did get the entire look and feel of that dance. And Nathan was actually enjoyable and likeable. He reminded me of a time when I lived for him and his lovely technique. They had chemistry (Shut it, Nigel) and they had character and they had charisma. That dance had it all.
Noelle Solo (Every Time It Rains/Charlotte March) – Competition crap. And she went for the penche turn that Shawna nailed on her season and tried to come out of it directly into an aerial and almost busted her ass in the process. Feh.
Ellenore/Jakob/Quickstep/Tony And Melanie (Missed the music) – Best Quickstep ever on this show. By a country mile. Kittens, Ellenore and Jakob just shut it down. The carriage was there. The footwork was there. Their posture in closed hold was impeccable. And those side by side jetes? Toma! And then they started tapping. Those two can tap, or at least comfortably fake it. Who knew? Is there anything that those two don’t do? Tony and Melanie really did give them a highly technically demanding routine and I never worried for a second that they wouldn’t pull it off. They just ruled that dance floor. Can they just dance together for the rest of the show? Because that? Was the best Quickstep ever on this show. Ever. Kiss of death my ass. That’s how it’s done, darlings.
Ryan Solo (Rock You Like a Hurricane/Scorpions) – Wow. That was painfully bad. It was James “Just felt like doin’ a little Paso” level bad. The use of Scorpions should have been a tip off, I suppose. I guess he didn’t fall off the stage, though. That’s something, right? Pray for him, family. He’s gonna need it.
Kathryn Solo (Beautiful/Bethany Dillon) – I am a Kathryn fan, y’all. Who knew? I hated this solo and found it only a cut above standard hair flinging nightmare territory (and that only because of her lovely control) but I love her, so it’s all good.
Mollee/Russell/Lyrical Jazz/Mandy Moore (It Must’ve Been Love/Roxette) – Mandy needs to step away from the I Love the 80’s CD immediately. Kiddies, I don’t care what the judges were pushing, this routine sucked tremendous amounts of ass. I kept waiting for them to actually start dancing. For minutes on end, they just seemed to be walking around the stage in their white PJs. And then all of a sudden, Russell would pick Mollee up and fling her around for a few seconds and then they’d go back to randomly wandering around. With a turn sequence thrown in just for shits and giggles. And dear lord, the Tween Terror cannot partner at all. Poor Russell. It was like he was trying to lift a bag of wet cement. Young lady, learn how to hold your own weight in a lift. You can’t just lay there while the gentleman does all of the work. This will prove true for other things as well in life, as you’ll find out later on. Or maybe sooner if you keep rubbing on Russell’s stomach like that. At any rate, this was bad.
Nathan Solo (Golden Train/Joshua Nozuka) – He did some beautiful work in that solo. That’s the most grounded I’ve seen him since his very first audition in S5. And I bought the emotion afterwards because he’s been sucking like a Hoover on the show and he finally, finally had himself a very good night. Am I getting soft, kittens? Nah. I still hated the cargo shorts.
5, 6, 7, Again
Noelle/Ryan/Smooth Waltz/JT and Thomas (Jeaux d’Eau/missed the artist) – Snooze. Noodles I was bored. Again. Some more. I mean, it was pretty enough, no? Ryan did show off his lovely carriage. I’ll even co-sign Nigel’s comments about the openness through the chest. He did a fine job showcasing Noelle. And I suppose Mary was right that Noelle displayed some lovely lines at times. But it was all just so . . . blah. There’s no there there.
Ellenore Solo (Beatbox Harmonica/Yuri Lane) – She’s a wonder. So rhythmical. So interesting. She’s quirky. She’s beautiful. She’s quirkiful. I am all about it, kittens.
Ashleigh/Legacy/Hip Hop/Dave Scott (Slow Down/Bobby Valentino) – Really, crack hos? Really? I see someone saw Twilight over the Thanksgiving weekend. Good lord. Poor Legacy and FP couldn’t have done much with even the best of routines in those ridiculous get ups. And of course, they didn’t have the best of routines to work with. Dave Scott is so hit or miss. And this, kiddies, was clearly a miss. That said, FP still came to put in work. She turned it out as much as it could be turned. I really thought FP had a great night with some not so great routines, which is a shame for her because I really think she’s in danger of going home this week on what was arguably her best pair dance night.
Kathryn/Nathan/Rhumba/Tony and Melanie (Walk on By/Aretha Franklin) – I think I may just really be in love with Kathryn, noodles, because I just loved this dance. I thought Kathryn oozed sensuality. Her legs were incredible. She made lovely shapes with her hips and shoulders. She had good snap in her legs and pretty feet. And Nathan wasn’t terrible. He wasn’t great, but he framed her well on most of the moves and he had some decent hip action himself. I’ll agree that the dance could’ve stood more ballroom content, but as with other routines tonight, what they were asked to do, Kathryn and Nathan did very, very well. And Kathryn is just magic, darlings. She even got me to like Nathan again and want to see him stick around next week. Float on, high talker.
Legacy Solo (No Air/Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown) – I wish somebody had pulled Legacy’s coat and told him to steer clear of this song. Josh/Katee own it lock, stock and barrel. That said, the solo was solid with lots of spectacular moves that didn’t even really match the song choice, so what was the point of choosing this song again? Exactly.
Ellenore/Jakob/Jazz/Sonya (Tore My Heart/OONA & Dave Tweedle) – I couldn’t love any of this trio more than I do at this moment. I have no words to describe how much I adored this piece. The choreography was interesting with a very unusual movement vocabulary. The dancers were so musical. And the technique on these two is just beyond belief. Ellenore has amazing core strength. Some of those freezes are just impossible. And I’ve never seen a man with Jakob’s extension. And control. Damn! Seriously, kiddies, can they just stay together for the duration of this season? Because that would be lovely.
Ashleigh Solo (Batucada Por Favor/Bob Azzam) – Oh, FP. And you’d been doing so well. It’s hard out here for a ballroom dancer. Gorgeous costume, though. It pulled attention from her broke down face.
Mollee/Russell/Jive/Anya and Pasha (Land of 1000 Dances/James Brown) – Anya and Pasha! Hell yeah. And they are such smart choreographers. Darlings, that was genius, what they did. Lots of solo work in that piece. Lots of side by side dancing. Very little dancing in hold. And they let the Tween Terror play to the cute side, not to the sexy. The result? A winner of a routine for Mollee and Russell. They were cuter than a basket full of kittens and puppies. The routine was fun and well danced. They connected like two friends in a Gidget movie and closed the show with verve and enthusiasm. If that is your last impression of them for the night, you’d vote for them is what I’m saying. Which is what you want on a night like tonight, no?
Jakob Solo (Always Midnight/Pat Monahan) – He was stupid good. This kid was just born to dance.
You’re the Tops
Jakob, Ellenore, Russell, Kathryn. Bless.
You’re No Good, You’re No Good, You’re No Good
I think Mollee, Noelle, and FP are locks for the girl’s B3. The boys are more difficult. Ryan is the only one I feel fairly confident saying is in some danger. I don’t think I’d be too far out on a limb saying that Legacy will probably join him. The choreography kind of let him down tonight and he didn’t connect with FP in nearly the same way as he did with Kathryn. That last spot is gonna be either Russell or Nathan. I’d be shocked to see Jakob go down. Since I put Russell in my tops, kittens, I suppose I should say Nathan here to round out B3. But honestly, he had a really good night and he cried, so I’m gonna completely contradict myself and go with Russell for your final B3 boy. I know! It’s after midnight and blogger’s gone wild.
Baby, You’re No Good
I would love to see the Tween Terror bite the dust, but I just don’t see it happening, noodles. I think her BFF, Noelle, may have danced her last instead. FP picked up a ton of steam being paired with Jakob all those weeks, but this will be a true test of how much he was carrying her along the way. She could go, but I think she’ll scrape by one more week and Ms. Personality Minus will get the boot.
For your gentleman, I’m banking on Ryan. (And there’s another reason I feel FP is not going anywhere. Simon Fuller does not want the backlash from booting both halves of the husband/wife team the same week) If not Ryan, then maybe Legacy will be on the chopping block.
And that’s the way I see it, kittens. But who knows what America will do now that you’ve got your grubby little hands on the controls.
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