SYTYCD S6 Finale Performance Show Good ‘til the Last Drop

Kittens, I’m so tired. I’ve been up since 5:00 am. And yet, I toil and slave to get this recap up in prep for Wednesday’s finale. All for you, darlings. All for you. There’s no formatting and little editing to this here blog post because, well, 5:00 am, y’all! Maybe later. And we’re going in reverse order because why not? I wanted to own Cat’s dress in several shades including that smashing red, so you knew they were going to be sick with it, right? Take it away, Top 6.

Russell/Kathryn/Hip Hop/NappyTab (I Can Transform Ya/Chris Brown) – I cannot believe that NappyTab used a song by the woman beater. They disappoint on so many levels. The dance was a distant second in the NappyTab hard hitting hip hop catalog behind Mark/Comfort (best NappyTab EVER!). If they wanted Russell to krump, why in the world didn’t they bring back Lil C? Honestly. Russell did what he could with it. He was great because he’s great, but the choreography and, I’m sorry but I must say it, Kathryn let him down. She tried her little heart out but she can’t krump. It wasn’t not good, Noodles. (Oh, Real World Tammy. How I miss you so)

Ashleigh/Ryan/Contemporary/Travis Wall (I’m There Too/Missed the artist) – Kittens, let’s deal with first things first. I can’t believe they wasted a chance to have the married latin ballroom couple come on and finally, finally, show these fools how latin ballroom is done. And on a night where they had Jason Gilickson, too. Oh, the dance-manity! There. That’s done. Quiet as it’s kept, kiddies, FP has torn this season up. Don’t get me wrong, I still hate that the fugly one made the final after not dancing a step last week, but she once again served tonight. Never moreso than here. She and Ryan did have a lovely connection. A quiet comfort with each other and an emotional depth that was lovely to see. Was that the most technically demanding dance of the night? No. But dammit, I love me some Travis Wall. He knew his dancers and what they could deliver and he worked that routine for all it was worth. And he did push them for being two ballroom kids. There was some gorgeous work in there. The lifts were always going to be good because Ryan . . . best partner dancer ever on the show . . . blasé, blasé, whatever. But darlings, blessed assurance to see a lady who knows how to engage her core and help out her partner through a lift. Whippersnappers, take note. That is how it’s done. The lifts looked effortless. And they had some lovely side by side moments, a couple pretty leaps. Very good movement quality and they both were very grounded in their movement. Travis Frikkin’ Wall, family! For a moment, he made me stop hating and get right with the DiLellos.

Kathryn/Jakob/Contemporary/Desmond Richardson and Dwight Rhoden (At this Moment/Michael Buble) – Bow down, bitches. The kings have just schooled you all. That choreography was gorgeous. Exquisite. So intricate. So much control required. And many interesting movements even during the transitions and in the connections between the real powerhouse, showpiece moves. And Jakob Karr. Kittens. Jakob Karr is a motherfucking rock star. He was born to dance. That’s all. There is really nothing he can’t do along the ballet/modern spectrum of the dance world, I don’t think. One of the best to ever dance on this show, in the pantheon with Blake, Danny and Will. (Brandon just a step behind this trio due to a certain lack of polish, which I think will come with time) I was blown away, too, by his partnering in this piece. Very solid. Very strong. Kathryn. Well, you know I love her, noodles. I do! And she had lovely moments in this piece. She demonstrated great flexibility. Good musicality. And her legs are a wonder. But . . . I have to throw a but up in there. Her dancing was a little bit light. Desmond and Dwight are straight out of that Ailey cum Graham technique and that is deeply centered and grounded in a way that requires so much core strength. Contrast Kathryn with Ellenore. Both lovely dancers in completely different ways. Ellenore’s movement is based around and flows from that engaged and solid core which allows for that patented “quirky” movement. You watch her and you think “strong”. A dance warrior, just as I labeled her last week. Kathryn’s movement is much more pulled up, as befits someone with more of a ballet background (which I’m guessing she has – most lyrical/contempo kids do). The word that comes to mind watching her is more like “ethereal”. And the piece required more strength. Not so light. She was lovely here. Lovely. It just didn’t wholly get there for me from her. And now I must stop talking because that last sentence sounded like the Dawg.

Ellenore/Russell/Paso Doble/Jason Gilickson (Village Attack/Blood Diamond Soundtrack) – Shirtless Russell blew my whole entire mind, darlings. That man’s back did things to my loins which are not discussed in polite company. And that ass in those pants was out of control. Sweet mother of god! I’m sorry, kittens, but I could barely even focus on the dancing. I think it was fine. Maybe? The carriage was right from both of them. Russell had good snap in his legs. The feet seemed a bit sloppy in places. But he was a commanding lead. He really did those lifts amazingly well. Oh yeah, Ellenore was there, too. I’m sure she looked fierce and danced well. I might have once thought that the little leap and then the wrapping the legs around the waist was a dynamite element of this routine. But mostly what I was thinking was that I wished those were my legs wrapped around that man’s waist. So, yeah. This dance was not about the dance is what I’m saying. Shirtless Russell Paso added onto the previous Shirtless Legacy Paso? SYTYCD likes me. It really, really likes me.

Ashleigh/Jakob/Foxtrot/Jean Marc – (Let the Good Times Roll/Butch somebody & Eva Cassidy) – It was cute and well danced. I wanted more refinement from the Fug Princess here. I went all the way back to one of her first smooth ballrooms, when one of the judges told her about needing more softness in her hands (too latin). That continued to be true. I also wanted more roundness in her frame. And really, I have to compare this Foxtrot to the Anya/Danny piece and, well, there is no comparison. I wanted more closed hold work. Jakob was fine. He’s really improved as a ballroom lead. But he really is kind of just too special to play the traditional male ballroom role, which is to frame and showcase the lady. He’s kind of like Cassie in A Chorus Line. So the leaps and the turns and the whole Jakob-ness worked because it always worked, but also didn’t work because the man’s role in ballroom is all about making you watch the woman and when he dances you can’t do other but watch him. They looked gorgeous, though. Snaps, tranny/hos.

Ellenore/Ryan/Jazz/Gary Stewart (Kontakt Me/Boys Noize) – See, noodles? See what I mean about Ellenore dancing more from her core and her movement quality being more grounded and more down into the floor? That routine made me glad that Gary Stewart stuck around after he and I had such a tough time with his first piece. Because that? I loved. Ellenore was riveting. She is so strong and so solid. Her movement is, dare I say it, very organic. We miss you, Mia!! I confess that I barely watched Ryan at all here, which is actually a good thing because that means that he held his own and didn’t distract from the overall quality of the piece. But this dance, for me, was the Ellenore show. She is a dance phenomenon, darlings. Trust that this is so. Wonderful, wonderful!

Ashleigh/Russell/Lyrical Jazz/Sonya (Angel Standing By/Jewel) – Beautiful, kittens. Gorgeous. Look at that fool's toe point and tell me that he has not had extensive training beyond Krump 101. I defy you. Check the traveling steps in deep plie in second. Check some of those leaps and spins. Just look at the arms, the posture. You can’t do that kind of work just by magic and wishing on your lucky street knowledge star. The bitch is trained. Can we now finally, finally put that madness to rest? And the Fug Princess was there doing her best early season Jakob’s shadow impression. Which is not a bad thing. She really is better than she has any right to be. But she disappeared from this dance almost completely, much as she did early in the season in her pieces with the talented Mr. Karr. Russell ruled that dance. He’s so, so serious, family. Please recognize. And that was a fabulous and unexpected piece from Sonya. She clearly got some of her normal, quirky moves in there, but her work is usually not in that tender, emotional, almost lyrical/contemporary vein. I loved seeing her stretch like that.

Ellenore/Jakob/Broadway/Tasty (I Gotcha/Fosse Original Broadway Cast Recording) – Tyce Broadway in the finale? And for these two? Really, Nigel? Really? And he’s just given up all pretense that he ever does anything other than copy Fosse now, hasn’t he? Well, own it, Tasty, I guess. He’s just lucky that these two bitches serve it every single time. Damn. They are so good. They are beyond good. Ellenore’s extensions rivaled Jakob in this piece and that is something which I did not even consider possible. Of course, thanks to Tasty’s unfortunate boy crush, the whole routine was really a paen to Jakob. There couldn’t have been even one more leap in that routine, could there darlings? And talk about bringing the Joel Grey! And then some. These two were sassy. And they brought the dirty, dirty vibe that’s so often missing from Faux Fosse on this show. They looked like sex and raunch and strippers in some upstate NY second class joint with pasties dangling. And the crack whores in wardrobe and trannys in hair and make up were on point again. What? The look was perfect, kittens. Just perfect. They could’ve been in the Broadway cast of Fosse and not looked out of place. That’s how good it was. If Tasty must do faux Fosse, let it always be thus please?

Kahryn/Ryan/Samba/Jason Gilikson (Magalhena/Sergio Mendes) – Ryan DiLello. Work! He was fire in that piece. So, so sexy. Holy smokes, noodles. I so wanted to see him dance that with Ashleigh. Kathryn was fine for a non-ballroom girl. And that was the problem, no? For all that the routine was smoking, it lacked some ballroom content. Not a lot of closed hold work. Not a samba roll in sight. As Ms. Debbie Allen once said, give it to me hard. Give it to me rough. This is the finals, no? I want to see greatness. With Kathryn here rather than, you know, the actual latin ballroom specialist they forced into the finals on pity and a prayer, the routine just gave goodness. Well, Ryan gave greatness. That man’s hips were moving just like mama likes it. And sincerely, crack hos, thank you for all the shirtlessness. Indeed. And what an ending! Jason G, you have brought it like it should be broughten this season. Hail and well met, sir. But it was a touch shy of mind blowing.

And the Winner Is . . .

Kittens, it sounds like I didn’t enjoy Kathryn tonight which could not be further from the truth. I enjoyed her and think she is a beautiful dancer. But of the four (because I do not consider the DiLellos serious contenders for the win), she’s in my #4 slot. She wasn’t shown off to her best advantage tonight. Coming third for me would be Ellenore. She had one two great routines, but she disappeared for me in that Paso, swallowed whole by the charisma and overall hotness of Russell. And between Russell and Jakob? Noodles, I couldn’t. Could you? Can’t we just have co-winners? If I had a gun to my head, I suppose I’d choose Jakob because, well, born to dance, no? But kittens, it’s much like last seasons Kris/Adam, Honey Dip/Glitter bomb Sex Baby, AI finale. If either one of them wins, I win. Well done, oddly truncated and overly rushed show.

PS: The fact that the bloated top 6 show robbed us of a top 2 boys’ dance and a top 2 girls’ dance from the Ellenore/Kathryn/Jakob/Russell quartet is a travesty. Fuck you Fox and Simon Fuller and the horse you rode in on. I don’t need a bloated two hour results show. I needed two hours for the performance show, which is true even when we are dealing with just 4 and even more so with 6. Bitches.